No doubt most of you hoople heads have seen my recent foray into reality television. The show was a complete success in that I haven't seen it as, my reader knows, I do not subscribe to cable television. I have seen it on a CD they sent me and the show did nothing to capture the real me. In spite of the directors/producers missing so badly, I've been contacted by numerous agents to date about certain projects, but there seems to be some problems with the contractual language I am demanding in order to sign. If you have contacts within the industry, maybe you can put some feelers out for me. See below:
John Mundelius, herein to be referred to as J-Go, will have sole rights to his image, personality, voice, body, and most specifically the parts attached thereto. In addition to the normal contingencies expected and intended under remuneration for his services upon agreement from (insert studio/production company name here), J-Go shall be entitled to the following as supplied to him by the signing (insert studio/production company name here):
1. At the start of production, Alec Baldwin shall be made available so that J-Go can kick him as hard as he can in the nuts. He will then declare that all actors are only acting and should never under any circumstance be listened to regarding anything.
2. The production company shall provide and demand that People Magazine put him on the cover of their publication at the beginning of any project. The title on the cover shall read something to the effect: Why J-Go Knows and Why You Should Listen.
3. The production company shall supply J-Go with a state of the art Winnebago with his likeness airbrushed on the side. His visitors shall visit him and state, "this thing kicks the crap out of the Madden Cruiser." If his visitors do not declare this to be a fact, the production company shall steal the Madden Cruiser for J-Go's usage.
4. The production company will declare that Scientology and Scientologists are somewhat freaky and that J-Go finds the whole thing just a little frightening.
5. Upon his request, J-Go shall be provided with tickets to any sporting event he wants. This of course will come with a bottomless cup of beer and 10 tickets for his entourage.
6. J-Go has sole rights to pick his entourage.
There's more but most of the agents stop after number six and hang up. They say they can get Danny Bonaduce for less money with not nearly as many stipulations. Danny Bonaduce couldn't paint my walls. I'll let you know when I sign and when I start my next project. I'm also thinking about my own show that will be a Dancing With the Stars cross with a Pamela/Tommy Lee video type genre. America is ready...I think.
John Mundelius also known as Johny GoFast or just J-Go
John Mundelius, herein to be referred to as J-Go, will have sole rights to his image, personality, voice, body, and most specifically the parts attached thereto. In addition to the normal contingencies expected and intended under remuneration for his services upon agreement from (insert studio/production company name here), J-Go shall be entitled to the following as supplied to him by the signing (insert studio/production company name here):
1. At the start of production, Alec Baldwin shall be made available so that J-Go can kick him as hard as he can in the nuts. He will then declare that all actors are only acting and should never under any circumstance be listened to regarding anything.
2. The production company shall provide and demand that People Magazine put him on the cover of their publication at the beginning of any project. The title on the cover shall read something to the effect: Why J-Go Knows and Why You Should Listen.
3. The production company shall supply J-Go with a state of the art Winnebago with his likeness airbrushed on the side. His visitors shall visit him and state, "this thing kicks the crap out of the Madden Cruiser." If his visitors do not declare this to be a fact, the production company shall steal the Madden Cruiser for J-Go's usage.
4. The production company will declare that Scientology and Scientologists are somewhat freaky and that J-Go finds the whole thing just a little frightening.
5. Upon his request, J-Go shall be provided with tickets to any sporting event he wants. This of course will come with a bottomless cup of beer and 10 tickets for his entourage.
6. J-Go has sole rights to pick his entourage.
There's more but most of the agents stop after number six and hang up. They say they can get Danny Bonaduce for less money with not nearly as many stipulations. Danny Bonaduce couldn't paint my walls. I'll let you know when I sign and when I start my next project. I'm also thinking about my own show that will be a Dancing With the Stars cross with a Pamela/Tommy Lee video type genre. America is ready...I think.
John Mundelius also known as Johny GoFast or just J-Go
posted by Johnny GoFast at 3:38 PM
5 Comments:
frickin' killin me, man.
... killin me.
How do I get to be in your entourage?
And what are the details of the show. Name, when, time, etc.. I've got to see what the French Country look is all about.
That's so french country. In fact with the blue and black used in your blog, it makes it french country on french country. You are AMAZING.
thought that vintage 80s sweatervest water polo look was so cutting edge even the show's star didn't get it. Best part was them getting you to say "I think it looks great" and then cutting away just as you are about to make a smart alec comment.
Big stars also have not 1 but 3 carbon emitting busses for the entourage - but offset to carbon neutral by only allowing the entourage one toilet paper square per restroom stop.
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