I'm not going to lie to you, I'm a really bad boater. There's so much to remember and everything happens so fast. Just when you gain a little confidence, the boating deities come and pummel you over the head.

So today, I'm out there with the wifeage to drop the boat into Donner Lake. We do really well, and counter to what you might think, we make a great boat launching team. I usually back the boat mostly into the water and then I get out and into the boat while the wifeage backs the boat up the last five feet. Before I leave the car, we have a little chat to remind each other that we love each other and that no matter what happens (she drives the boat trailer off the ramp, I back the boat over the swim area, the guy with the great tan and humongous pecs tells us we're "doing it wrong"--all of which has happened more than once), we still love each other and this is fun! Anyway, today goes off without a hitch. The lake was calm, there were no other boats waiting for us to get our crap together, and there was nobody in the swim area. The wife parked the truck and trailer while I docked. She joined me and we made a quick lake cruise as we waited for the kiddiewinks to finish up their day camping. With a new found 30 minutes to burn, I decided to take the wifeage into a secluded cove. We chatted about how easy boating had become as I desperately searched for a spot to throw the hook (nautical term for anchor).

I thought this was the perfect opportunity for a little zooma-zooma. It was then that she screamed, "we're sinking." To my shock and horror, I looked aftward (also a nautical term) to see a massive puddle of water. I also looked into the ski locker and saw about six inches of water. Mos def, we were going down. It was then that I realized that I hadn't checked the plug. For those of you fortunate enough not to own a boat, the "plug" is the thing that invariably gets left out when you need it most. No less that 13 times today, prior to launching the boat, did I tell myself to check the "plug". No less than 13 times did I forget. So naturally I panicked and immediately headed back to the boat ramp at break neck pace. But I knew that my skill set to get the boat on the trailer and my wife's ability to get the trailer in the water would take us more than the amount of time it would take for the boat to fill and sink. So I beached it. I knew that if it was beached, it couldn't sink. I had to swim under the swim deck to confirm our worst suspicions that the plug was indeed out. Once confirmed, I had to dunk myself in that snow fed water to seal up the boat. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, which is a miracle. I sit here, as the rest of the bilge empties, knowing that I don't have to answer either of my brothers when they ask, "which one of your f-ckin' friends sank the boat?"

Any way, hope you are well and if you have the chance to buy a boat...run like hell.

Johnny GoFast