Monday, September 20, 2010


So you can always tell when it's cross season around my house, because you will often find me at the kitchen table folding laundry. The wifeage does most of the year round folding and can seemingly do it while watching a movie. I, as you probably could guess, can't do both activities at once. So I fold at the table where I can sort accordingly. You may recall that one race equals two loads of laundry folding. It's a fair swap and truth be told, it's really light duty compared to all the other heavy lifting the wifeage has to do on a daily basis.

After pre-folding three loads on Saturday evening while the wifeage and girl were at the Jonas Brothers concert, I loaded up with the boy and we headed down to CCCX#1 on Sunday morning. It's the first time it was just the two of us together. Last year we traveled to races with the Ouzounian's, but they were committed to actually making a difference in this world by doing a fund raising event for the NorCal Mtb High School league and couldn't attend the race. The boy did a fabulous job entertaining himself by riding around, catching crickets and frogs and such. He was at the ready to hand me a bottle too, though I didn't need it. After the race I asked him how it looked and he said, "fast and scary." He was positioned at the bottom of a technical little drop and I asked him if he saw anybody crash. "Six in your race and one other guy before your race started. One of the guys was really hurt because he used a lot of cuss words," he added. "Which ones?" I asked. "The 'F' word, the 'S' word and the 'G-D' word all in a row," he said not knowing if I'd get mad for him even knowing those were bad words. "That's some serious potty mouth," I replied and we both giggled. I could go into some holier than thou sermon now about not cussing at a family type event, but I'm certain I've been that guy in the past, so I figure this is the world evening it out a bit.

After the race we headed up to the Boardwalk for some good old American fun. The boy has been talking pretty big about riding the Fireball ride for a while now. I went along because I figured he'd get a look at it and chicken out. But the boy has stones and didn't back out, so I had to ride it with him. If you've been on it, then you know that the ride is apoplexy in motion. Once was enough for me. So much so, that I had to immediately grab a tall boy beer just to get my heart rate to come back down. The boy rode it two more times.

Anyway, pretty damn good weekend all the way around and it's great to be back out there racing. Looking forward to a lot more laundry folding in the coming months. Hope you are well.

Johnny GoFast

Friday, September 10, 2010



Anyone who has seen the above video knows that giving the wifeage a household appliance is seriously looking for their balls to be cracked. Like the time I got the wifeage steak knives which almost ended up embedded in my chest (in my defense, they were very significant top of the line knives--which we needed). But every once in a while, sometimes I like to zig when others would zag. So I went off the menu yesterday and got the wifeage a vacuum cleaner for her birthday. The ladies at work were all curious as to what I got, and fearing their scrutiny, I pleaded the fifth. And when said wifeage unwrapped said gift, the planets aligned, the skies parted and the angels smiled down on me. Homefuckingrun! Now if you're a guy, I don't recommend replicating this feat, as your results may vary and you may indeed end up getting neutered. However, if your wifeage is like mine and can see the brilliance in a robotic vacuum cleaner that moves about the house cleaning the floors as if by magic while the wifeage is out shopping or chai latte-ing or nail polishing or kid chauffeuring, then I say get up, run out and pick yourself up a Roomba Robotic Vacuum cleaner.

On to the weekend where I look to be Cyclebrating. For those of you keeping score, these will be the first races of the year for me.

Johnny GoFast