So instead of doing the Thanksgiving Day Worlds (what an absolutely horrible name), I was talking with a fellow Fargonad and mentioned that mountain bike ride they do over out of Fairfax. I've done this a few times in the past and as I recall, it had a huge grin factor. Does this thing still go off and are there any people interested in hooking up? Would need to coordinate a time and a place. I've always done it in association with somebody that knew what the hell they were doing. Is it pretty self explanatory? The other guy that is interested has never done it. Let me know. Hope you are well. My hip is no better and I'm starting to get concerned that my racing may be done for. Crap out loud.

Johnny GoFast

So the trip to the doctor went pretty good. This is how it went:


Doctor: What seems to be the problem?

GoFast: Well, my hip doesn't seem to be right. Me pulling up my boxers to show the affected area.)

Doctor: (Visibly aghast as he moves in and starts poking the swollen area with the blunt end of his writing implement.) How in the world did this happen?

GoFast: I arrested my forward progress by throwing myself on the ground whilst trying to bike race some other people.

Doctor: Emm-hmmmm. (Still poking and alternately kneading the area like my hip is some sort of bread dough.) Does it hurt when I do this?

GoFast: Not any more than if you don't touch it at all.

Doctor: Emm-hmmmm. What kind of bike racing? (He then made me do like a sideways leg lift against his hand and then do one forward as well.)

GoFast: I did it Cyclocross racing. It's kind of a hybrid of road and mountain bike racing.

Doctor: I've been wanting to get into that. I have a neighbor, Gannon Myall, do you know him?

GoFast: (So much for Doctor/neighbor confidentiality.) Know him? Hell, I didn't invent the "man crush", but I'm aware by now of it's power.

Doctor: Your leg is good to go. The strength is still there. It's going to take about eight weeks to fully recover. You don't need any special meds or anything.

GoFast: Eight weeks!?!

Doctor: It will gradually improve. It will be noticeably better by next week. You will be dragging the leg around a little bit, but you shouldn't risk doing any further damage.

GoFast: Well, I guess that will have to do. Thanks for looking at it.


Anyway, suppose it could be worse. I walked in with my head hung low and walked out like Fred Astaire. Now I've got my fingers crossed that it will improve dramatically by Golden Gate. I'm saying it'll hunt.

Johnny GoFast

I may not have a mother anymore, but thank (insert the deity of your choice here) I do have Morgan Fletcher. I'm not a big fan of going to the doctor. They usually say things like, "you'll have to rest that" or "you have cancer." Just not a big fan of hearing stuff like that so I keep those doctors squarely in my blind spot. But my hip is in about the same shape as it was on Sunday morning, though it's all sorts of different colors now but not as swollen. I tried to ride (failing some sort of IQ test, no doubt) on Tuesday and it hurt just about the whole time. It doubly hurt if I had to go up any kind of incline. I could apply zero pressure with the left leg due to the sharp pain it would send into the left hip. So now, with the urging of Morgan, I'm signed up to go see my orthopod. I did something similar to my hip about 10 years ago and had to go on blood thinners. The doctor told me that it would have been bad to have skipped out on taking them because the internal bleeding could have resulted in blood clots or the calcification of the blood into a hard bone like substance. Ick. I guess I'm just hoping it's not that serious and that he tells me I can keep on riding and that it will be much better tomorrow. Still have some racing to do and the thought of it all being over sends a tear down my cheek. Oh the cruelty of that siren called bike racing. No doubt I'll be back on tomorrow with news of my doctor visit.

Johnny GoFast

Number of times crashed on Saturday night? Correct answer is four yet only one was pilot error. The first was the result of a teammate banging into somebody in front of him I think. If you saw two Fargonads trying to disassemble their joined bikes, I hope you kept your snickers to yourself.

Number of feet on the ground when they blew the whistle to start the race? Correct answer is two. As we all know, you need to have one foot on the ground at the start of the race (per the rules). Though a poor strategy, I thought it would be cool to be doubly in compliance.

Number of different bikes raced on Saturday night? This one is a trick question. Technically, the answer is two. But really the correct answer is two plus a little. I had to go to the back up bike after I crashed into a downed rider and inadvertently peeled off the tubular from the front wheel. Later, when again I was unable to avoid smacking a crashed rider in the same spot, I peeled off the back tire on the back up bike. (Heck, maybe it was the same rider who failed to get up the first time--I saw Tom's email about the scarcity of litter left about the venue but nothing about downed racers. Please people, if you know of anyone that didn't come home from that crazy race, please get in touch with your local authorities. Time could be of the utmost importance). So I ran to the pit, yet again, and did the old switcheroo/cannibalized routine with what I had (for the love of Pete, where the hell is McGyver when you need him).

Number of beers post race? Toughest question on the board. Correct answer: A lot.

Number of Advil popped since hitting the pavement at the start of the start/finishing straight? 16.

Next scheduled race? Districts on Sunday.

Probability of making it to the next scheduled race? Zero. Having a hard time walking. My right foot is in serious pain today as is the right hip. Contemplated having the wifeage collect my crutches that I keep at the rock pile yesterday. I chose to not move from my house instead hobbling about like a wounded vet.

Anyway, thanks for taking the quiz. I really did have a great time on Saturday night, and despite my follies, felt I was really cooking out there at times. Special thanks to all the people that stuck around to cheer for us and to my teammates who made the effort to get out to one of these things. Hope you are well.

Johnny GoFast

Got out of bed yesterday morning, and I have to admit, I did not feel like racing. The legs felt fine and I had lots of energy, I just couldn't summon up the motivation to fling it all out there and endure the pain. I got out there and after a couple of pre-laps on the course and a decent warm-up, I was feeling better about my decision to race. When the gun went off and we started around the slippery morass of Candlestick, my needle definitely hit the happiness quotient, though the pain was running full stick as well. But on those occasions where I needed to dig deep to hold a wheel or bridge up, I could get there and tolerate. And then on the third lap I hit one of those sidewalks and I tore the tire off the front rim. (Note: still not running the tubulars so I was old schooling it on the tubular/clinchers) Anyway, I had to run about a half a lap at which point everyone seemingly went by me as I tried to get to my back up bike. And when I got there I hesitated just briefly thinking, "fuckit...I'm out." But as I looked at that perfectly good back up bike, I thought of the wifeage and what her reaction to a DNF would be and I grabbed it and took off. It took me two laps to find my legs again at which point I was able to make my way past a few guys on the last lap to salvage 25th. And suddenly I feel as if somebody hit the reset button. Project Johnny suffered a bit of a hiccup the past week or so, but now I've got renewed motivation to get back up there and race. There's a little bit of time yet to wring out some more speed. Time to get cracking. Hope you are well.

Johnny GoFast